In a remarkable bid to attract disillusioned Redskins fans, the Dallas Cowboys announced Monday that they are establishing a special relationship with Washington supporters that will allow fans of the Landover team to join the Texas franchise while preserving their liturgy and spiritual heritage, including fat men who wear dresses and pretend to be hogs.
The worldwide Redskins fan base has been racked by 10 years of conflict over the interpretation of holy football scripture that has led to clashes over the West Coast offense, pricey free agents and stadium parking fees.
The Cowboys' plan "reflects a bold determination by Dallas to seize this moment and do what it can to reach out to those who share its stance on such ecclesiastical matters as strong offensive lines, play-calling in the red zone and, duh, actually winning football games," said Harvey Cleats, dean of the Virginia Gridiron Seminary. "It is very, very bold."
The new system will give the Cowboys a way to capitalize on tensions within the Redskins community.
The Redskins broke from reality in 1999 when King Danny the First bought the team. With his loyal retainer, Prince Vinny of Cerrato, seated at his right hand, King Danny has brought such hardships on Redskins worshipers that some worry for their very souls. FedEx Cathedral has been the site of much garment-rending this season, made worse when fans' sackcloth and ashes have been confiscated by King Danny's henchmen.
However, observers are amazed at the boldness of the Cowboys' move.
"We realize this may come as a surprise," said Dallas spokesman Jimbob Jockstrap. "We know that many Washington fans have grown up wondering if there's anything worse than being a fan of the Dallas Cowboys. And now they have an answer: being a fan of the Washington Redskins."
For years, the Washington Redskins have struggled to reconcile their warring factions: Portis versus Sellers, Snyder versus Turner, Snyder versus Schottenheimer, Snyder versus Spurrier, Snyder versus reality.
Under the new system, Redskins fans would transfer their loyalty to Dallas but be allowed to keep some traditions from their liturgy. For example, they would be allowed to sit together at Dallas games, recite their holy verses (including "Hail to the Redskins, full of grace, Jim Zorn is with thee") and possess such holy relics as burgundy-and-gold "No. 1" foam fingers.
"We do not make this decision lightly," said Redskins fan Buster Tailgate, leader of a splinter sect that worships Saint Sonny Jurgensen. "But, c'mon, how much more can we be expected to take?"
I'm sorry when I become a loser, moron, idiot and ding-a-ling, then I will consider being a Cowboys fan. I was born in the DC area the Redskins have been in the past, is now and will be my teamin the future.
A REAL REDSKIN FAN DOESN'T DESERT THEIR TEAM.
When the Redskins become superbowl contenders again then those so called Redskin fans will come back. If you leave the Redskins when are this bad, then do the real Redskin fans a favor, stay out when they become good again.
Quote from: WES on October 26, 2009, 11:08:39 PM
I'm sorry when I become a loser, moron, idiot and ding-a-ling, then I will consider being a Cowboys fan. I was born in the DC area the Redskins have been in the past, is now and will be my teamin the future.
A REAL REDSKIN FAN DOESN'T DESERT THEIR TEAM.
When the Redskins become superbowl contenders again then those so called Redskin fans will come back. If you leave the Redskins when are this bad, then do the real Redskin fans a favor, stay out when they become good again.
I totally agree Wes. I always stand by my team whether they're flying high or crawling low. Don't get me wrong, I know frustration does set in, but no one will ever be able to call me a "bandwagon fan". As you can imagine, it can get interesting being a New York sports fan as there's soooooo many haters, but it is what it is.
Never could understand why there's so many Cowboy fans in the DC area. I hope there's a lot of Redskin fans in Dallas.
Wayne, Wes, DCT Members,
I hope you all know, that was a tounge in cheek posting.
I will NEVER abandon my Redskins.
My BFF, the woman I should have married, instead of Wife #1, told me that at least we have "The Ravens" to cheer for. I reminded her, that the ONLY Birds I recognize from Baltimore, are The Orioles.
The 1 bright side. . . I can GUARANTEE that The Redskins, or the local team here to me, The Buccaneers, will NOT LOSE Sunday 1November09.
Both teams have the BYE week.
Even NBC's Sunday Night Football Night in America
has a Bye week.
If you rode The Bandwagon in the 80's & 90's, its not time to jump off now.
Quote from: WayneNYC on October 27, 2009, 12:49:24 AM
Quote from: WES on October 26, 2009, 11:08:39 PM
I'm sorry when I become a loser, moron, idiot and ding-a-ling, then I will consider being a Cowboys fan. I was born in the DC area the Redskins have been in the past, is now and will be my teamin the future.
A REAL REDSKIN FAN DOESN'T DESERT THEIR TEAM.
When the Redskins become superbowl contenders again then those so called Redskin fans will come back. If you leave the Redskins when are this bad, then do the real Redskin fans a favor, stay out when they become good again.
I totally agree Wes. I always stand by my team whether they're flying high or crawling low. Don't get me wrong, I know frustration does set in, but no one will ever be able to call me a "bandwagon fan". As you can imagine, it can get interesting being a New York sports fan as there's soooooo many haters, but it is what it is.
Never could understand why there's so many Cowboy fans in the DC area. I hope there's a lot of Redskin fans in Dallas.
;D That made my day.
I have to agree with the rest of you all. I'm not a "bandwagon fan" either. As much as our team sucks, I'm a Redskins fan for life no matter how bad we are. Especially us that grew up in DC, were use to this. We have sucked in every sport for years. Look at our track record....Baseball/Nationals=HORRIBLE, Basketball/Wizards=Not looking promising this season, Football/Redskins=Can't wait for the season to end. The only things good are the Hockey/Capitals and Soccer/DC United!! Am I on to something?
They really need to get under some new management because on there next game i bet half of the stadium will be empty.
Quote from: DE42LFA on October 27, 2009, 11:41:30 AM
They really need to get under some new management because on there next game i bet half of the stadium will be empty.
Yes, clearly some major changes need to happen. That said, I don't think the fan base is going anywhere. They may fall short of sell-outs, but I suspect the fans will continue to attend the games.
Quote from: rideonrulez on October 27, 2009, 10:48:49 AM
I have to agree with the rest of you all. I'm not a "bandwagon fan" either. As much as our team sucks, I'm a Redskins fan for life no matter how bad we are. Especially us that grew up in DC, were use to this. We have sucked in every sport for years. Look at our track record....Baseball/Nationals=HORRIBLE, Basketball/Wizards=Not looking promising this season, Football/Redskins=Can't wait for the season to end. The only things good are the Hockey/Capitals and Soccer/DC United!! Am I on to something?
Chris - In regards to the Nats, I'm sure it can't be a DC thing as they weren't contenders as the Montreal Expos either. I do get the feeling their front office is serious about improving the team to make them competitive.
Quote from: rideonrulez on October 27, 2009, 10:48:49 AM
I have to agree with the rest of you all. I'm not a "bandwagon fan" either. As much as our team sucks, I'm a Redskins fan for life no matter how bad we are. Especially us that grew up in DC, were use to this. We have sucked in every sport for years. Look at our track record....Baseball/Nationals=HORRIBLE, Basketball/Wizards=Not looking promising this season, Football/Redskins=Can't wait for the season to end. The only things good are the Hockey/Capitals and Soccer/DC United!! Am I on to something?
It's the curse of the new stadiums, I'm telling you. The Bullets were great at US Air but ain't so hot at Verizon, The Skins were the bomb at RFK but ain't doin much with FedEx, even the Nats were pretty good at RFK but barely exist at Nats Field. Dunno how the Caps managed to elude the curse, probably because Ted sort of knows what he's doing...
I just hope for my sake that DASH (http://forums.dctransit.info/index.php?topic=1099.0) doesn't go down the crapper...........
Quote from: rideonrulez on October 27, 2009, 10:48:49 AM
I have to agree with the rest of you all. I'm not a "bandwagon fan" either. As much as our team sucks, I'm a Redskins fan for life no matter how bad we are. Especially us that grew up in DC, were use to this. We have sucked in every sport for years. Look at our track record....Baseball/Nationals=HORRIBLE, Basketball/Wizards=Not looking promising this season, Football/Redskins=Can't wait for the season to end. The only things good are the Hockey/Capitals and Soccer/DC United!! Am I on to something?
Your too young my friend, to remember a REAL LOSING Franchise. . . The Washington Senators.
(1st in War, 1st in Peace, dead last in the American League East.)
The Washington Senators, before they became The Texas Rangers in 1970, or 1971 (George Bush I dont remember which bought the team. . 43?) were SO BAD, than the last game of the season, last game as Washington Senators, were beating another American league team (no inter-league play back then) when some over zealous fans, stormed the field, tore up the sod, removed bases, anything that wasn't nailed down, they took.
By the time order was restored, the umpires declared that The Senators would forfit the game, even tho we were winning.
That was the ULTIMATE slap in the face. Then 30+ years on NO Baseball in DC.
They were playing the Yankees in their last game as the Senators.
Weren't there some close calls in getting a baseball team to RFK? I know of the case where the family that owned Giant were in the process of buying the Padres to the point that they created jerseys and Topps made "Washington N.L." cards of Padres players, but I seem to remember that one point before the 2000's that DC was the default-city-for-a-troubled-team-to-move-to like LA is now for the NFL.
As for which Bush owned the Rangers, it was 43 before he beat Ann Richards to become governor of Texas. If he ever returns to the public eye (and wants to improve his image in the eyes of some/many), he would make a great commissioner once Selig inevitably retires.
As for a curse of new stadiums, I think we can add the Orioles to that list regionally; Great at Memorial, horrible at Camden. However, I wouldn't call Nats Park cursed yet, the Nats are still a team that's trying to recover from a decade of hell (Loria in Montreal, MLB's ownership, Minaya, the Lerners rocky start, Bowden, list goes on...) and the building is too new.
The reverse is also true in which a new building changes fortunes for the better -- Phillies at CBP, Steelers at Three Rivers and Heinz, football Cardinals at UofP, Patriots at Gillette, Ravens at M&T. The baseball Cardinals have won the World Series their first full season at their last two stadiums! Maybe the Cubs should leave turn Wrigley into a museum and build something new :-p
I always only considered the curse as applying to DC teams :-)